My Dearest Kentucky

Caleb has been writing in the paper for a couple of months now. At first he would sit down with me and ask me to critique what he wrote, or type it out and text it to me. Sometimes we'd have to brainstorm ideas for a column together, because he wasn't sure what he wanted to write about. I'd also doublecheck to see if he had sent it into the paper.

So last week we were sitting at Variety Pizza and our conversation went like this.

Me: "Caleb, did you send in Novice Notions."

Caleb: "Yep."

Me: "What did you write about?"

Caleb: "A letter to Kentucky."

Me: "What in the world did you write to Kentucky?"

Caleb: "You'll just have to buy the paper and read it to find out.

So, on Thursday morning, I did just that... and proceeded to sit in my car wiping tears from my eyes as I read these words.

 



 

As I read those words, I thought about heritage and how we are all a product of so many things. A lot of those things I could relate to...

Being forced to wake up and go to church almost every Sunday of my life.
Mamaw's handpies and Papaw Paul calling me "kadiddle hopper".

Because Caleb is a little extension of me, and what we learn, we pass on to others.

So as I thought about what he loved about Kentucky, I couldn't help but think of myself.

Kentucky, I love you because of hot summertimes where the creek was dry and I could go crawl on a sun-warmed rock in the creekbed and read about other times and places and people. (And didn't think about the snakes that were probably lurking nearby. This makes me shudder to think about now.)

I love you because of treks up Natural Bridge where I would stand close to the edge and worry about tottering off, looking down into that vast green canopy of trees and thinking about Daniel Boone crossing into new territory (because as a kid I didn't really realize that Natural Bridge wasn't where Daniel Boone crossed over).

I love you because of chilly creek waters and mudpies in the summertime.

I love you because of the Mountain Parkway, that first glimpse of the mountains in the distance as you go through Powell County, letting me know that I'm heading home.

I love you because of friendly faces on small town streets.

I love you because of the bouncing of basketballs on hard wood floors, an almost religion across this state.

I love you because you have taught me hope: hope that even though we let the greatest football coach of all times leave, and have struggled since, especially through Joker... and continued to struggle under Stoops (who I like), I cling to hope that our football team will get turned around.

I love you because of white fences and rolling hills of bluegrass and beautiful horses grazing.

Mostly, I love you because you are home. The place I choose to live. I could go anywhere in the world. Every place in America needs nurses, and with Wallace's vast resume I'm pretty sure he could find a job in something (because how many teachers/coaches/military/healthcare administrators do you know?)

But I didn't leave because I love you. Even in our struggles. Even in our poverty. Even though sometimes we are apathetic to our situation. Even though we are often unwilling to change (and I am just as guilty).

Just as Caleb said that you sometimes make him feel closed in, you make me feel protected. Secure. When I see those mountains, I know where I came from, and knowing where we came from can help us know where we need to go.

So thank you. Thank you for teaching me to be open to new people even though I see the same people on the street everyday. Different is sometimes good. Thank you for teaching me that in order to be successful, I had to work... and marry somebody that works a little harder. Thank you for teaching me that family is everything and that all we have is each other. Thank you for teaching me about love in action... I've seen it in every disaster this part of the state has faced.. in tornados or floods, we bind together and support one another. Thank you for being in the Bible Belt so that I learned that God is in the details. If you've ever seen a Kentucky sunrise in the fog of these mountains you know there's a great Creator. Thank you for my heritage.

There's no place like home.

Time

It seems like yesterday I was standing on the sidelines chewing my fingernails and praying that we'd make just one more shot.

Time waits for no man.

And just like that... I've been married for over 16 years and I'm still standing in a gym praying we'd make just one more shot.

Sixteen long years of game plans and defenses and late nights and popcorn for supper and yelling at the refs and loving on girls after their coach has done just the opposite.

Sixteen years of pacing around gyms and wishing for just one more second on the clock, because time is relative when you're playing a ballgame.

The clock ticks slow when you're leading but drags on when you're behind.

Time seems to stand still as girls shoot free throws and the ball rolls around the rim.

Time flies by and before you know it those same kids have kids and are coaching against your husband.

Time...

Time and again I say I love high school basketball and I mean it every time I say it.

And tomorrow... the finals for the 14th Region All A tournament.

It's our time.

Or rather, my girls' time.

Some point out that we are a larger school than most schools in it, and that is true.

No, we aren't technically a Class A school, but we have a declining population and were invited to fill one of the spots.

Because the All A is for the smallest 131 schools in the state of Kentucky.

I think this tournament comes at a prime time because our kids need it.

Not just my ball girls... but kids in Breathitt County in general.

We seem to have gone back in time as we've been under state management the last few years. (Not that I'm against state management. I think it was time that our district made some changes. We're still in the process of making those changes, and it will take time for us to get to where we need to be.)

Somehow, some of our kids got lost in the transition.

And this tournament... well, it's a way to show our kids that Breathitt County isn't all that bad.

The excitement in that gym was palpable tonight.

And when time was up...

we had won.

I saw fire in the eyes of those players...

But I also saw pride in the eyes of our pep section.

And it's about time.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today, where we write for 5 minutes about one prompt, no editing, just writing.

Word today?
Time...

Dreams Don't Work...

I've always loved to write. I do my best thinking with words, pen on paper; or lately, keys on keyboard.

I can't remember a time when I didn't enjoy writing. Oh, I didn't like writing my alphabet over and over again... but creating stories? I'm pretty sure I did that from the moment that I knew how to form words.

I mostly write for myself, although I like sharing here to help encourage others. I feel like if it's something I'm struggling with, chances are there is someone else who needs encouragement with it as well.

Sometimes I have this big dream that maybe I can write something worth reading...

I mean, a lot of the times I think I write things worth reading.

But I dream of publishing.

Having my name in print.

Doesn't that sound prideful?

I have lots of story ideas. I have Caleb, who provides me with endless content... except he's getting older and isn't too fond of me sharing those stories.

I could write about nursing. So many things that you do in the clinical setting are hard to believe unless you experience it. Nursing is truly the best profession on the planet, some days... but it is very, very hard on other days. It can be one of the most rewarding and most challenging all in a matter of seconds.

Or I could write about Eastern Kentucky... maybe a fiction novel set in a small town like Jackson, where nothing really happens.

A devotional? I love reading my Bible.

To do anything well, you have to practice, and that's what this write 365 days is for me. It's creating the habit of writing. I still do this pretty late at night, just before bed, and not for a set time. Just making sure I get in at least 15 minutes a day.

To be a "true" author I would think I'd need to be more committed. Set aside an actual block of time each week.

So, maybe as I look ahead to the coming week, as I reflect on this past week, I'll try to add in a small block of time where I could work on an actual writing project. Maybe spend some time brainstorming some ideas.

Because dreams don't work unless you do.

Somebody's Gonna Win....

Today's powerball is $1.5 billion dollars.

I'm not even sure how much money that is.

Wallace bought some tickets, so like most of America I'm dreaming of what would happen if I won the lottery.

Could you imagine the books I could buy?

And the time I'd have to read?

Seriously, though.

We'd pay off our bills and pay off our parents bills and make sure that our families were set. We'd support our church.

We'd provide a huge endowment to Breathitt County athletics and make sure that there were plenty of volleyballs to hit. The SMS football team would never have to fundraise again.

We'd sponsor scholarships to HCTC and I'd build a new nursing lab. I'd build a community rec center with an indoor swimming pool and a movie theatre.

We'd donate to charities. I'd use it for many, many random acts of kindness.

To be honest, I have no idea what we'd really do with that money.

Chances are, if someone does win tonight, they won't know what to do with it, either.

Even though I can't fathom that amount, I'm pretty sure it could  be more easily spent than one might think. After taxes... and paying off bills... and wasting it... and your 9,999,999 new friends...

And then there is the fear that would have to come with it. If someone found out you had that kind of money... what a huge target on your back.

So tonight as I'm dreaming about what would happen if I were to wake up a billionaire (hello, shopping spree!!!), I'm thinking about a verse from the Bible.

We're told to lay up our treasures in heaven. Our reward there can't be spent. We've received a free deposit into ourselves of our inheritance in the form of the Holy Spirit... and the inheritance waiting is more than we can imagine, too.

"Don't store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be."- Matthew 6:19-21

Back on the Wagon

Y'all.  Pride stinks.

I've been so proud of myself for maintaining my weight all of 2015.  Going back to work means seeing people you haven't seen in a couple of weeks, and I had several people tell me "You've lost more weight."

And I had... until last week.

I can't blame it on the holidays, although I may have indulged a little in red velvet cupcakes.

I can blame it on brown butter cookies from Yoder's in Knott County.

Two plates of them.

Yes. 

I've also been increasing my water intake, so this morning I almost let myself be convinced when Wallace assured me that the five pounds I gained this week is water weight.

Until I considered those brown butter cookies.

I've preached and preached about how my weight loss hasn't been focused on diet, and I still stand firm on that. I really haven't limited what I've eaten, and have found that increasing my exercise has balanced it out. I weigh every single day, first thing in the morning. Some research advises against that, because of fluctuations that may be discouraging, but it helps me admit if I'm starting to go down the wrong track. I've also started tracking what I eat, writing it down, which research shows helps you be more aware.

Apparently brown butter cookies take a couple of days to be metabolized into fat. And maybe I didn't quite realize how many times I wrote down "brown butter cookie".  Or maybe I did and just thought that I was invincible.

So tonight, I got on the treadmill even though I really didn't want to and walked an extra half mile when what I really wanted to do was crawl in the bed under the heated blanket and drown my weight gain in white chocolate Kit Kats.

And tomorrow I'll keep drinking water and maybe opt not to eat the large fry with my value meal.

On second thought, I'll be having popcorn at the concession stand and walking laps during the game because that's just what I do.

Wonder how many laps one brown butter cookie equals?

Pinterest

During Christmas break, I spent some time on Pinterest.

Just as I had previously avoided the Netflix binge addiction, I had avoided logging on Pinterest and perusing for hours.

Namely, because I don't cook and I'm not a DIYer.

But also because from previous experience, when I first logged on to the site a year or so ago, I learned how easily it is to lose hours of your life.

I'm not even sure how I ended up on Pinterest. Maybe someone had posted something on facebook and I clicked on it.

There I was.

Literally with the world at my fingertips.

Because, y'all.

You can find anything in the world on pinterest.

I pinned articles to read later (that I still haven't read) and quotes to use and writing prompts for when this #write365 days idea just isn't working.

But who needs writing prompts when you can write about Pinterest for 15 minutes?

Binge Watching

I've never been an avid TV watcher.

Through the years, I've been a fan of many shows. On the days we'd come home straight after school, I loved the Brady Bunch and the Munsters and the Adams Family on TBS. I loved The Cosby Show and The Wonder Years and Full House. Family Ties and Different Strokes and Saved by the Bell. Fresh Prince of BelAir and Blossom. Because I loved the book series, Little House on the Prairie.

And nothing compares to ER and Friends.

But to say that I never missed a show... well, not really.

Y'all know that I'd just as soon read a good book as to watch a TV show.  In fact, on days when I'm at home alone, I usually don't turn the TV on unless it's to watch Dance Moms while walking on the treadmill or a basketball or football game.

I've never been one to binge on Netflix.

Except last year, when Caleb wanted me to watch Once Upon a Time with him and I needed to catch up to know what was going on.

And now.

Wallace and I have been watching Making a Murderer. We started watching it when I saw numerous posts on facebook and also when we saw it on the news in the morning. We're not necessarily binge watching, although we have watched about half of the series in five days.

Our conversations through the show go something like this.

Wallace: "I'm not sure if he did it or not."

Me: "Hmmm"

Wallace: "I think they've set him up."

Me: "Hmmm"

Wallace: "I don't know. Maybe he is guilty."

and so on and so forth. Wallace has never figured out that you're not supposed to actually talk about the show as you are watching it.

I've not yet to form an opinion. There are several things that make me think he could be guilty, but then there seem to be some serious problems with the investigation.

And Kami tells me that even after I watch the whole thing I probably won't be sure.

It's outraged many across America, and petitions have been signed for his release.

What it's mainly made me think of is how we can make entertainment out of even the most heinous of situations.

Which is kind of scary in and of itself....