Discipline

There is a word that I don't really like.

Actually, there are lots of words that I don't really like... but there is one that is really hindering me.

Discipline.

As in... I don't have any.

That's right.

I signed up for a challenge with Sara for a 7 week faith and finish challenge. As part of that challenge, I'm blogging about my experience every week...

Which means that I'm accountable to someone.

You'd think accountability and self-discipline would go hand in hand... except maybe the fact that I need accountability means that I have no self-discipline.

I already knew this... but looking over my progress the past week just confirms it.

I have lots of reasons why I didn't hit the treadmill every day... or even four days. 

We had late night ballgames a couple of days.  I had a busy schedule at work.  We went to a play in Pikeville and I was so tired when I got home.  The electric blanket felt too good and I didn't want to get up early.  My knee is hurting.

Excuses. 

Because it is much easier to sit on the couch and read than to make myself get on the treadmill.

Admitting you have a problem is the first step, right?

Except I should be past that phase...

Sara sent out an email yesterday about guilt.  This is how my mindset usually goes when I set goals and then don't follow through...

I give up completely.  I binge on donuts, might as well eat everything in the kitchen.  No exercise today? I'll start next week...
But it's next week and I'm still averaging 7,000 steps a day. 

This isn't a new problem for me. I've written a couple of different times about stopping and starting and stopping and stopping again.

I can't do this on my own.

And I don't have to...

Because He is with me.

Last night, I was reading in Matthew 6.  There's a passage that talks about not worrying about tomorrow.  Jesus is basically saying that He's got it all under control. Last night, one of the verses stuck out to me.  I am taking it totally out of context here, so don't let that be a stumbling block to you.

"Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body..."

Don't worry about what you're eating or drinking or your body...

Because His grace is sufficient and He gives us our daily needs.

Just a few verses before that, He tells us that, in the Lord's Prayer, "Give us this day our daily bread."

I just have to learn to turn it over to Him.

Lord, I need your help.  I know that my body is Your temple and that You want to be glorified through me. I'm reminded of that race analogy, and how I must demonstrate self-discipline, but I'm weak. I'm like Paul, I hate what I do yet do it anyway... and hate that I don't do what I should. You know what I need before I ask, so walk with me.  Help me make the right decisions, and when I stumble, help me not to beat myself down.

Sara's goal this week is to increase fruit and veggy content.. which shouldn't be hard for me since last week I don't think I ate any.  Yes, you read that right.. none. Zip. Nada.

Also, 10,000 steps average.  And four days of at least 2 miles.  And keeping track of my food. 

Call me out on it. Ask me if I've hit the treadmill. Please.