Today I'm at home sick with Caleb. Well, he's sick, and I've been chatting on-line with Arzella and Jenna and Andrea and Ludrenia trying to get stuff ready for next Monday. I think we're in pretty good shape... I got a lot accomplished. My door schedule has been submitted, my course assessment form has been submitted, Blackboard shell has been worked on some (though it still needs some work), syllabus is ready for copying, and the calendar is almost ready. Pretty good for a sick day, right?
But back to my boy. He's got strep, and right now is sitting on the couch playing with his Ipad. He actually took a nap today, and I laid down with him. I thought he was asleep, and raised up to get my computer so I could get started on some work (let me just say I don't know what got into me. I'm a procrastinator by nature, so the fact that I was actually willing to do some work means that maybe I might need to go to the doctor.) "Where do you think you're going, Mom? It's time to snuggle. That's why you took OFF." So snuggle I did. And there might have been a nap. Like a 2 hour one. But we won't draw attention to that.
He's still a little pale and his throat hurts, and he's still running a low-grade fever (ok, it was 101 at 12. But it's back down now.) And I'm sitting here looking at him, at his wonderfulness (is that a word), and thinking about the part of scripture I read today, from Genesis. It's the part about Abraham and Isaac. A familiar story, for sure, and one I was sure I had written a blog about last year, but I didn't see it. If I have, forgive me.
There's that whole suspense thing as they approach the mountain. Abraham demonstrates his faith when he tells the servants they leave behind, "Wait here. We'll be back." Emphasis on We, because he knew what God was asking. "Your son. Your only son, whom you love..." does that sound familiar? A prototype of Jesus, God offering His Son, His only Son, whom He loved...
So they make the trek up the mountain. We don't know how old Isaac was, but some of the commentaries I've read said in his late teens. Could you imagine asking a teenage boy to walk up the hill carrying a stack of wood? When I read this, I had him pictured as a young boy, about Caleb 's age. I think of how Caleb asks questions constantly. A teenager might not have done this, but Isaac does ask "Where is the lamb?" I'm also thinking of how when I am worried about something, Caleb's constant questioning can make me nervous. Frustrated. Impatient. I wonder if Abraham was any of these things with Isaac, or if he just enjoyed his journey up the mountain with him?
Then the height of the story. Isaac is bound to the altar... Did he struggle? Did he say, "You crazy old man (and Abraham was old. After all, he was 100 when Isaac was born) what do you think you are doing?" Surely his youth and age would have made him a victor, and he could have darted down the mountain on the other side. What kind of trust does it take for a young man to allow his father to bind him on an altar?
The same kind of faith it took Abraham to do the binding. To raise the knife. Oh, can't you just hear the exhale of breath? "Stop, Abraham. I know you trust me."
And Abraham looked up, and saw the provision. I wonder how long the ram had been in the thicket. Had Abraham just been looking at his son, the situation at hand, and failed to see the provision? Because isn't that just how we are sometimes?
God will provide... because His grace is sufficient. Even when we can't see the provision for our problem.
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