I have been blessed with low anxiety for some things... but then there is a whole other part of my life that I do worry about. I often worry about things that are apart from my control. I worry about not being good enough... not being a good enough Mom, wife, friend, teacher, student... you fill in the blanks. I worry that I don't do enough, or that I do too much. I worry that I don't know my purpose in life... that this journey is supposed to be some big grand adventure, and most days it really feels like I'm on the same track, going round and round.
And I worry about what other people think. I've always done this. Always been a people pleaser, even though inside I was wishing that it really didn't matter to me.
I'm not alone. In chapter 9 of Renee Swope's book A Confident Heart, she talks about all of the things that we women worry about. About the what ifs... have you ever done that to yourself? Or carried on that conversation in your head hours after you talked to someone, about why you said something so stupid?
Worry seems to multiply. It can smother us. It can suck the life out. It can keep us paralyzed, afraid to move forward.
But God...
"Thou hast beset me behind and before, and laid thine hand upon me."
"I look behind me and you’re there, then up ahead and you’re there, too— your reassuring presence, coming and going." The Message
"You have encircled me; You have placed Your hand on me." HCSB
See, in Psalm 139:5, we're told that God surrounds us. He's before me. He's behind me. The KJV says, "hast beset me." Beset is translated from the Hebrew word meaning "fortify, seige." He's putting a hedge around me... protecting me.
And it surrounds me. This verse tells us He's behind me. He's got my back. He's before me... He's already been where I'm going. He has laid His hand upon me... covering me. Blessing me.
#WhyWorry? He knows me. He loves me. Even if noone else doesn't (not that I am being melodramatic, because I do have people who love me. But sometimes that worry sets in about not being good enough... and if you have it, too... know that He always thinks you are good enough. YOu are His masterpiece!!!)
In Him, we can have peace. No worries!!!
Lauren, I was shaking my head the whole time I was reading your post. I understand all the worries you listed here. I have walked them and lived them and it is draining and exhausting, isn't it? Thankful that He is transforming us from the inside out as we plant His Word deep in our hearts. We can know that because Jesus is enough, we, too, are enough. I love what you shared about our verse this week. Last night while studying, I looked up those same translations and was envisioning God encircling me and placing His divine hand upon me. Thank you for a sweet reminder this morning. What a blessing to call you friend. Love~Shelly
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing Lauren-I can relate to much of what you have said!
ReplyDeleteNancy Silvers (OBS Small Group Leader)