Priorities and Time

Today I was a little melancholy.

I'm not sure why, exactly, except that the weekend goes by so quickly.

And the fall foliage was beautiful on Pine Mountain, but the leaves were falling quickly, which led me to think of how soon winter is here.

And I have an almost 16 year old who was sitting in the front seat.

Almost 16.

I found myself thinking this weekend how quickly time really does fly. It seems the older I get, the faster it goes.

I guess that can be a good thing and a bad thing... good because if you're dreading something, it won't last for long. Bad because you blink and your baby is 16.

So, in my melancholy mood, I found myself ruminating on lots of different things.

How hard I find it to make friends and how lonely I feel sometimes.

I've been clinging to the belief that you have to fight for joy, but sometimes the battle is long and we get weary, even though our blessings are staring us right in the face.

Joy in the moment is something we must fight for, because as I said, time goes by so quickly and if you're not joyful, you're wasting the time you've got.

I preach that to myself probably ten times a day, and most days I preach sense into myself... but then other days it feels good to wallow.

As bad as I hate to admit it, I'm a wallower sometimes.

God gets it, though. We know that because one of the best stories Jesus told to illustrate salvation and mercy and grace had a young man spending his time and his resources unwisely (hello, procrastinators and those who dwell on the difficulties...) only to end up wallowing in a pigsty.

I'm so thankful He's not put off by the smell of mud, because I sure stink of it sometimes.

Wasting time... in whatever form you choose... is a joy killer.

Today I looked at my calendar and was shocked to see that there's only one more month in the year. I mean, I knew it... but it just doesn't seem real.

Every month my planner gives me the opportunity to appraise my previous month. I've not always filled out the pages, but this morning I paused to review the month of October and found that I honestly didn't remember much of it.

I then found myself looking at my priorities... or what I believe to be my priorities. My time doesn't reflect what I think are my priorities. Too often I get bogged down by stuff that doesn't even matter to me.

So today we drove to Letcher Co. to see the fall foliage on Pine Mountain. Brilliant oranges and yellows and reds...

And I forced myself to walk, enjoying the cool breeze as the sunset (at 530 PM.  I will not complain about the time change. I will not...)

And I ate a cupcake and loved every morsel of the strawberry flavor, even though it probably defeated the purpose of my walk.

I read my Kindle for a few minutes and soaked in the bathtub and read Jeremiah and Ezekiel because I'm months behind on my Chronological Bible reading.

Tomorrow I'll make time for family and laugh with them and celebrate my boy's birthday at his party and try not to dramatize the fact that on Tuesday he'll be 16... and then I'll blink and he'll be 40 and I'll be near dead.

Ok... so melancholy AND dramatic are kind of my forte...