Agree to Disagree

So the timer is ticking down on my 5 minutes to write and I still feel at loss for where to start.

The prompt for this week's Five Minute Friday post (written late Saturday evening, because that's how I roll), wasn't something that automatically jumped out at me.

I'm not one to like conflict, but I am passive aggressive about it. I'm not really vocal unless it's to people for whom I really care (like my family... and that can get me in trouble. Just tonight I blurted something out and put Wallace on the defensive when I really didn't mean to...)

So, sometimes it'd be easy to take my silence during conflict as a sign that I relate to what you're saying...

That I agree with you.

When so often I don't.

I think in our world we have become so polarizing that it's hard to see past the arguments we hold close to our heart. There are dividing lines drawn in the sand, and we each have our place and our podium...

Our soapboxes.

Unlike the great debates of the past, though, our respect and common decency tends to hinge on the opinions of others.

We don't know how to agree to disagree.

Instead, we keep spewing hateful words until everyone listening has a headache, and are physically sick on the bitterness of those words.

I may seem like I'm exaggerating, but I'm not. Scroll through your facebook or twitter feed and you'll see it, too...

When we agree, it means we see things in a similar manner. We often have common experiences that guide our perception. We have a positive reaction to the other person.

It's easy to respect someone who's like you... whose mindframe is like yours... who won't argue with you.

But as a Christian, I'm called to walk a fine line... judge but not judge. Live in peace but live as a light. Call sin a sin, but make sure I'm not looking at sin through the plank in my eye and missing the big picture.

Accepting isn't the same as agreeing.

Loving isn't the same as agreeing.

We are, however, called to live in agreement with each other in the church... to support one another. To edify each other, and build each other.

As I think about this prompt (and my five minutes are up, but my 500 words are not, so I'm cheating...) I can't help but think of how when we aren't in agreement, we can try everything to change the other person's mind... but if they aren't willing to accept it, nothing will change.

To agree to disagree is to stop the discourse, to accept the other person and offer respect.

It's not easy, because our first instinct is to want to be right... but there are two sides of every story, and even if the other side isn't necessarily "right" (even Biblically), there is still a rationale behind it. Pointing fingers will never open someone's eyes... respectfully demonstrating love in action just might.